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:/ Reading this at the same time as Rereading the Culture series has made me think a lot about what is "utopian" a concept that, from previous studies, I know to be very different depending on particular cultural expectations. nytimes.com/2018/05/02/opinion/incels-sex-robots-redistribution.html
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One of the more interesting concepts in The Culture is that in their utopian society (where you can really get any resource) people can basically change sex at will and often (but not always) pursue relationship structures we'd think of as unconventional.
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End-stage (as in evolved to the maximum capability of corporality) societies, both The Culture and equal level entities, are still pretty interested in sex, having it, pursuing it, and adding inventive new methods
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In this particular take on Utopia one of the key issues is you can't just take who you want. For better or worse Banks explores consensually in The Culture often in opposition to 'lesser' civilizations. Even extends to 'simming'/VR, though in those it is a taste judgement
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*consensually -> consensuality