Chronotope’s avatarChronotope’s Twitter Archive—№ 74,812

                1. You don't need to be clever with your weird tech company name. Just take a word and remove the vowels like your grandchildren did.
              1. …in reply to @Chronotope
                Really new Yahoo should have just been a nicely cryptic Yh.
            1. …in reply to @Chronotope
              Really, it would be to Yahoo's advantage to make its name impossible for humans to say Less talking about Yahoo would increase its value.
          1. …in reply to @Chronotope
            You don't need to be clever with your old tech company's new name. You could just take a different exclamation. Ohno!
        1. …in reply to @Chronotope
          It would scale out the same way too. Yodelers could inexplicably go Ohnooooooooooooooooooooooo! in your TV ads.
      1. …in reply to @Chronotope
        That way when people read any future Yahoo news and go "oh no" you can just be like 'what? they were just saying the name.'
    1. …in reply to @Chronotope
      Or could shorten it a bit for young teens demographic to get excited about. Drop the Ya and just be Hoo. As in 'Hoo the f**k is that?'
  1. …in reply to @Chronotope
    Or pivot, ask P*rnhub to buy you out and drop an extra letter. Just be Oo.
    1. …in reply to @Chronotope
      Look, you know, honesty never hurt anyone. Just rename the company to 'Dear God, Verizon Buy Us Before Any More News Else Comes Out, Inc.'
      1. …in reply to @Chronotope
        Stock listing: DGVBUBAMNECO
        1. …in reply to @Chronotope
          I feel, in retrospect, I missed a valuable DGAF opportunity here.
          1. …in reply to @Chronotope
            New Yahoo should be: Dear God, All is Falling Apart, Verizon Buy Us Please!, Inc. DGAFAVBUP
            1. …in reply to @Chronotope
              Yeah, that was too long to go for that joke. Kind of like Yahoo's existence.
              1. …in reply to @Chronotope
                I would have just called it 'Yahoo, we fired Marissa Mayer and will hire a white dude, love us now?'
                1. …in reply to @Chronotope
                  Or maybe "Yahoops There Goes Your Email Account Security and Password!, Inc."
                  1. …in reply to @Chronotope
                    Anyway, Goodbye Yahoo - You really tried to make purple and an exclamation mark work and I can respect that in a brand.
                    1. …in reply to @Chronotope


Search tweets' text